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What Makes Some Couples Change Their Minds about Divorce?
The statistics for the rate of divorce across the country are staggering. While different situations lead to divorce, not all couples who initially consider or plan on divorcing actually go through with it. A recent article published by USA Today examines this fact and considers what makes separated couples give marriage another shot.
Research on the Decision to Divorce
The decision to divorce is usually a hard and complicated one. It often begs the question, “Why do people decide to divorce?” and, other times, “Why do couples sometimes change their minds about getting divorced?” According to the article, new research has been done to examine these questions and shows that there is even uncertainty among those couples who have already filed for divorce.
The Rights of Grandparents in Illinois
In child custody matters, the child’s parents are not the only members of the family whose relationship with the child will be affected. Often times, there are extended family members on both sides who may be interested in securing time and solidifying their relationship with the child. However, under the law, only certain family members are able to petition the court to do so. Additionally, those who are eligible to petition the court will likely only get their requests granted under certain situations.
Illinois Law for Grandparent Visitation
In Illinois, grandparents have the right to seek visitation of a minor grandchild, provided that certain circumstances exist. Not only is the burden of proof for the petitioner to fulfill greater in a grandparent visitation case than in a parent visitation case, but there are also specific factors that the grandparent petitioner must meet in order for the court to award visitation with the minor grandchild.
Study Finds Emotional Qualities of Long-Term Marriages
Robert Levenson, UC Berkeley psychologist, became interested in studying marriage and divorce during the 1980’s, when he launched his longitudinal study with 156 couples in California. Levenson recruited couples from newspaper ads, public transit stations, senior centers, and churches, touching base with the couples every five years to learn about the challenges and triumphs the couples faced in their marriage.
The recorded conversations with the couples were coded for facial expressions, tones of voice, topics discussed, and body language.
Levenson found several different results from the study. He believes that couples who stayed married longer than 15 years were more likely to value and accept each other, and have given up on the pretense of trying to “change” their partners.
Healthy Marriage Funds Have Little Impact
The federal government has invested hundreds of millions of dollars into programs that are designed to promote healthy marriages, but a new study has found this spending hasn’t impacted marriage or divorce trends the way they were intended.
By the end of the fiscal year, the government will have invested $800 in the Healthy Marriage Initiative to fund multiple programs to improve relationships.
Between 2000 and 2010, marriage rates continued to decline, especially in locations where a lot of Healthy Marriage Initiative funds were used. The study, conducted by the National Center for Family and Marriage Research at Bowling Green State University, reviewed more than $600 million federal dollars spent between the same period.
What Types of Spousal Maintenance Exist in Illinois?
Spousal maintenance, also referred to as spousal support or alimony, refers to the transfer of money or assets from one spouse to another after a divorce. Spousal support exists in order to prevent a divorced spouse from suffering from a decrease in his or her standard of living due to a divorce.
It is not uncommon in marriages for one spouse to be employed and the other to be untrained or out of the workforce. After a divorce, it is very difficult for those who were not employed outside of the home during the marriage to obtain jobs that allow them to keep up with the standard of living they were used to while married.
Depending on the circumstances, a couple may choose one of three different types of spousal maintenance. The first type of spousal support is called rehabilitative maintenance. This type of support generally has a set time frame and ends when the receiving spouse is back up on his or her feet. During the set time period, the receiving spouse has a chance to adjust, return to to the job market, and establish their own financial independence. Next, we have permanent maintenance. This type of agreement, hence the name, is permanent and will only end in the event of the death of one of the previous spouses or after a certain condition arises, such as remarriage. Permanent maintenance is sometimes awarded after an exceptionally lengthy marriage or if something is stopping the receiving spouse from entering the workforce, such as a physical disability. Although maintenance is permanent, payments are not set at one sum forever and may be negotiated upward or downward over the years based on changing circumstances. The third and final form of spousal maintenance is called temporary maintenance. Traditionally, this type of support is awarded to a spouse while the divorce is pending, as a divorce can sometimes take up to a year or more to be finalized. Maintenance will end when the divorce becomes final. Spousal maintenance is not for all divorcing couples, but it is helpful to be familiar with the different options that exist. If you and your soon-to-be-ex are considering setting up a spousal support agreement, do not hesitate to contact an experienced Illinois family law attorney to assist you.
Rebuilding Relationships After Divorce: No Laughing Matter
The “mother-in-law” has historically been the brunt of many comedic one liners. How many mothers-in-law does it take to screw in a light bulb? None – she always gets the son-in-law to do it! How many mothers-in-law does it take to ruin a marriage? - Just one, mine!
If you and your spouse are entering into divorce proceedings there is probably more involved in your decision to divorce than either of your respective mother-in-laws. It is not about light bulbs or your mother-in-law is responsible for the deterioration of your marriage. Although you may chuckle at the mother-in-law zingers, you may actually enjoy spending time with your spouse’s mother. You both just recently broke the news to your families. The silence was deafening. The wall went up. Blood is thicker than water. You have been worried and apprehensive about the upcoming divorce proceedings. Trying to keep a teary eye on the kids, meeting with your divorce attorney and struggling to maintain composure. Staying in touch with your spouse’s family members on the same level of pre-divorce kinship crosses your mind occasionally. Will the divorce automatically extinguish your relationship with your in-laws? With children involved there will likely be some type of civil exchange, but what can you do to salvage the bond you created? Time heals all wounds. Your in-laws are no different. Will the relationship weather the storm? It can. When you feel you are navigating calmer waters, take a moment and put pen to paper. This maybe the best way to reach out to begin the healing process.
The Use of Medical Teams to Work with the Illinois Department of Children and Family Services (“DCFS”) to Help with Early Detection of Child Abuse
Child abuse is a heinous and often hidden crime that is difficult to detect and, even when detected, it can be difficult to punish the perpetrators. Once child abuse is suspected, the Illinois Department of Children and Family Services (“DCFS”) has in place an extensive plan to investigate the allegations and concrete measures to take to further protect the child from harm.
Child Protection often begins with a simple call to the Child Abuse Hotline. A person speaks with a Child Protective Services (“CPS”) worker, who has special knowledge and training on the child abuse laws of the state. If, at the end of the call, the CPS worker determines a formal report needs to be written, a CPS worker will begin a formal investigation. The mandate requires that the investigation begin within 24 hours of the written report.
Child Custody Rights Under the New Law “Right of First Refusal” in Illinois
On May 22nd 2013, Illinois unanimously passed the Right of First Refusal (“ROFR”) law in both of its Houses of Congress. It was officially implemented as part of the Illinois Marriage and Dissolution of Marriage Act Section 602.3, and went into effect on January 14th, 2014.
The new section provides that “(i)f the court awards joint custody…or visitation rights…the court may consider...whether to award to one or both of the parties the right of first refusal to provide child care for the minor child...during the other parent’s normal parenting time.” The law also stipulates that emergency situations may act as exceptions.
Many new questions will now be raised about what effect this new legislation will have on the relationships of divorced parents. Equally as important, it is not clear what effect it will have on the day-to-day lives of the children of divorced parents. What role a secondary caregiver, like a nanny or babysitter, will play may also be significantly impacted by this new legislation.
Keeping Your Dirty Laundry Out of the Public Eye
Few legal matters are more sensitive and personal than a divorce. The breakdown of a marriage and the decision to separate is often made after months or years of reflection and personal struggle. Yet, it is important to remember that divorce is a public act. Just as a marriage itself is a public affirmation of a relationship (with attended benefits and obligations under the law), the dissolution of that union requires going to court and having official action taken. As a result, most of the divorce details--at least all items filed with the court--will likely become public record.
Divorce records are no different than criminal records, foreclosure proceedings, or any other matter involving the Illinois civil or criminal justice systems. In fact, an Illinois law titled the Marriage, Dissolution, and Invalidity Records Act specifically charges the Illinois Department of Public Health with “registering, indexing, and preserving records” of marriage and dissolution of marriage. The law further charges the department with crafting online and offline systems to manage these records and make it easy for anyone--from journalists to your neighbor--to view those records.
Can the Custodial Parent be Ordered to Pay Child Support in Illinois?
Following a divorce or separation by parents, a court in Illinois may grant sole physical custody to one party. This parent is usually referred to as the “custodial”parent, and the non-custodial parent will usually still have visitation rights. In most cases children will spend far more time with a custodial parent, and that parent will have more obligations to provide proper care.
Late last year, an Illinois Appellate Court issued an opinion in the case of In re Marriage of Turk. The case originally involved a court order that required a custodial father to pay the non-custodial mother $600 per month in child support. The court was influenced by the fact that the father earned roughly $150,000 per year while the mother earned $10,000 or less.
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