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Out of all of the marital properties that must be divided in a divorce, perhaps none carries a greater emotional weight than the family home. It may be the place where you and your spouse began your life together, or where you have raised your children and made lasting memories. However, as you consider what will happen to your home during the divorce, it is best to try to set aside emotions and make a rational plan for achieving your desired outcome.
Because Illinois requires an equitable distribution of marital assets rather than a 50/50 split, getting a divorce does not mean that you and your spouse will have to divide the value of the house down the middle. Rather, you have a wide range of options, especially if you are willing to work together to negotiate a solution. Some of the possibilities include:
One of the hardest parts of getting a divorce is seeing the effects on your children, and even parents with the best of intentions can struggle to establish and maintain a post-divorce environment that serves the children’s best interests. One specific challenge that parents may face is maintaining consistent rules, expectations, and discipline when the children are dividing time between two households. Here, we offer suggestions that can help you avoid parenting mistakes and work on an arrangement that helps your children adjust and thrive.
As you adjust to your new co-parenting routine after your divorce, here are some unproductive approaches you may find yourself taking:
As societal trends evolve, each new generation has its own views and priorities regarding marriage. Millennials, who currently range in age from their mid-twenties to late-thirties, are at a point in their lives when marriage is common, but their approaches to marriage, and often, their approaches to prenuptial agreements, reveal different needs from the generations that came before them.
Not every marriage requires a prenuptial agreement, but if you are a Millennial preparing for marriage, you may want to consider an agreement that addresses the following issues:
For many divorcing couples, mediation can be a great option to keep conflict to a minimum and avoid an expensive, public trial. However, what works for one couple does not always work for another, and in fact, there are some circumstances in which attempting mediation can be counterproductive or even dangerous. As you work toward a divorce, you should be aware of the signs that mediation may be wrong for you.
Divorce mediation is a cooperative approach to divorce resolution in which both spouses meet with a neutral third-party mediator who is professionally trained to guide negotiations. A mediator will not recommend or enforce solutions, but he or she will attempt to ensure that each spouse has the opportunity to voice his or her perspective and help the two parties recognize opportunities for compromise. When spouses have the right mindset, mediation can help them resolve their divorce more efficiently and amicably.
A divorce can impact children at least as much as, if not more than, their parents. The emotional distress of the breakdown of the family is often difficult for children to cope with, and many of the decisions made in the divorce will have a direct effect on the children’s lives. With so much at stake, it is reasonable to wonder whether children have a say in what happens during the divorce process, or whether they are at the mercy of their parents and the court.
Fortunately, there are ways to ensure the child’s needs and preferences are considered in any decisions that affect them. Particularly regarding parenting time and the allocation of parental responsibilities, an Illinois court will:
Financial issues can be not only a major point of contention during the divorce process, they can also be a reason for the marriage failing in the first place. In fact, the American Psychological Association reports that 31 percent of people in a marriage or romantic relationship claim that finances are a significant source of conflict. However, it is possible for a married couple to healthily address finances and work through challenges that arise, which may save your marriage and help you avoid resorting to divorce.
The following suggestions can help you and your spouse prevent destructive conflict over finances both before and during your marriage:
During the divorce process, one of the most important items for both parents to agree to is a parenting plan that addresses parenting time and parental responsibilities. This agreement may come about through negotiation, mediation, or other collaborative methods between you and your spouse, or it may come in the form of a court ruling issued by a judge, but in either case the terms are legally binding. In the months and years following your divorce, if you find that your ex is failing or refusing to honor the agreement, you may need to pursue the legal enforcement of your divorce order.
Parenting plan breaches may arise out of carelessness, hostility, a change in the relationship between you and your ex, or resentment surrounding the initial terms of the agreement. Some of the most common violations include:
When you get a divorce in Illinois, you can expect the court to ensure a fair distribution of marital property. However, you may have additional concerns about your ability to support yourself financially after your divorce, in which case you should explore the possible option of spousal maintenance, also known as spousal support or alimony. Spousal maintenance is not a required part of every Illinois divorce resolution, but it may be awarded in cases of need.
If you and your spouse are willing to cooperate throughout the divorce process, you may be able to negotiate for the spousal support that you need as one piece of a larger divorce agreement. For example, your spouse may be more open to paying spousal support if he or she is able to retain important property as part of the division of assets. If negotiation is not possible, you can also pursue spousal maintenance by demonstrating your need to the court.
Getting a divorce can create financial strain for both spouses because of the required division of assets and the potential for child and spousal support obligations. This may be especially difficult if you have significant debt at the time of your divorce. If you are not careful, debt problems can become increasingly complicated after your divorce, so it is important to consider options that can alleviate your debt burden during the divorce process.
You may be aware that marital property will be divided in your divorce, but it can come as a surprise that debts accumulated during your marriage are considered part of that property. This may be true whether the debt was incurred by one spouse or both together. Marital debt can come from many sources, including mortgages, car loans, student loans, business loans, and credit card debt. Any remaining marital debt at the time of your divorce must be distributed fairly between you and your spouse.
Domestic violence is, unfortunately, a widespread problem in the United States. Each year, more than 12 million people are victims of physical or sexual violence from an intimate partner, and this abuse often extends to children in the household as well. If you or a family member is suffering from domestic abuse in Illinois, an order of protection can help keep you safe from the perpetrator. An experienced attorney can help you understand how an order of protection works and which type of order is best for your situation.
In Illinois, an order or protection can prevent an alleged abuser from continued abuse, physical contact, proximity, and communication with the person who has been abused, as well as that person’s children, dependents, or legal guardians. Orders of protection are enforced by local law enforcement officers, and they can be filed independently or together with a petition related to divorce, parental responsibilities, guardianship, or adoption.
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