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Wheaton family law attorneysIn an ideal world, every divorced or separate couple would put their differences aside and make great efforts to effectively co-parent their children. Unfortunately, the world is quite far from ideal. Some parents are narcissistic or vengeful. Some are abusive. In either case, the healthy parent is hindered in their co-parenting efforts, and the child may suffer. Parallel parenting may be a solution to these difficult situations. 

What is Parallel Parenting?

Parallel parenting requires each parent to focus on their own interactions with the child. You do not concern yourself with the rules at your ex’s house. You let go of concerns over diet, bedtimes, and discipline (unless there is abuse, in which case you are encouraged to talk to an attorney about your options). In short, you do you and allow the other parent to do the same.

While it may seem strange to let go of what happens when your child is away, odds are, the other parent also wants what is best for the child. They may not make the same decisions that you would, and their rules may be different, but that does not necessarily make them wrong. 


Illinois divorce attorneysAlthough children of any age can struggle with divorce, toddlers may be especially vulnerable to the stress and changes within their environment. To make matters worse, to children in this developmental stage, parents are everything. They are the center of their world, the place they turn to when they feel hurt, alone, or scared. Divorce can disrupt that bond, especially when one of the parents leaves the home. Thankfully, parents can mitigate against this issue. Learn more with help from the following information, and discover how an experienced divorce lawyer can help you through the process.

Keep Conversations Simple and Child-Centered

Telling your child about the divorce is the first step in the process, and it should be approached with great care and consideration. Keep the conversation simple and straightforward, focusing mostly on the ways that the divorce will impact (or not impact) your child. Remember: toddlers are self-centric, and they are unable to grasp the complexities of divorce, so the impact that it will have on them is the information they want and need most.


Posted on in Divorce

equal parenting timeIn Illinois and likely in other states across the country, many court systems are hearing arguments by groups and other organizations advocating for equal parenting time in child custody cases. These groups make their case based on reason, as well as appeals to emotion, to some extent. It is often argued that a child benefits the most from having an ongoing, consistent relationship with each parent. In many cases, this makes sense, and even those who are adamant that equal parenting time is in a child’s best interest acknowledge there are certain exceptions to this general rule. However, a recently published article points out that there are those on the opposite side of this issue, regardless of how prevalent equal parenting schedules are becoming.

Legal Measures

Many states are facing decisions involving legal efforts to change standards for courts in making child custody determinations. To be sure, the country has come a long way in the evolution of child custody decisions and parental rights. In the early history of the United States, fathers generally kept custody of their children and mothers did not enjoy legally enforceable rights.


Posted on in Divorce

blended families holidaysThe holidays are often a stressful time for families, regardless of whether relationships are strained. Often, the hassle of traveling, shopping, cooking, and preparing meals takes its toll on all individuals involved. However, in families who are going through a transition, either because of a new marriage, or perhaps because of a divorce, the holiday season may be one in which tensions are running particularly high. According to a recently published news article, the key to keeping emotions in check over the holidays is managing expectations with family.

Expert Advice

Experts say the key to enjoying the holidays comes down to managing expectations with family. Establishing your own family traditions should be a priority. If you plan on changing your schedule for the holidays, for example, by spending Christmas Eve or Christmas morning in your own home as opposed to that of another family member, and this is likely to conflict with other family members’ expectations, let your plans be known well in advance and remind others of them if and when necessary.


Posted on in Divorce

absent co-parentNavigating the process of divorce is often difficult enough, particularly when children are involved. Add to that the stress of dealing with an ex-spouse who is removing themselves from a relationship and the process can become even more challenging. The involved parent is left to address these issues with the children and may not know how to do so. A website has offered the following tips on helping children through this very type of situation.

Tips on Dealing with a Disengaged Parent

Newly single parents who are trying to establish a new way of life with their children have a difficult task ahead of them, but when children are also facing rejection by their other parent, additional issues must be addressed. This situation often brings up feelings of anger and sadness, not to mention confusion on the part of both parent and child. Disengaged parents will often cancel visitation, fail to participate in activities with their children, or neglect to attempt to communicate or connect with their children. Here are some ways that a parent can help their child deal with a disengaged parent:


Posted on in Divorce

divorcing parents schoolSummer vacation and a break from school means different things for different families. For some parents who got divorced or made the decision to do so, it may have been a summer of adjustment and even grief. Divorced and divorcing families certainly go through a lot, from changes in finances to emotional challenges. Having navigated these circumstances all summer, and perhaps getting into some sort of comfortable routine, the task of getting kids ready to go back to school may seem more daunting than ever. However, there are some things newly divorced or divorcing parents may want to consider in preparing to send their children back to the classroom.


A recent article outlines five strategies that may be useful to employ with children who will be returning to school this year with divorced or divorcing parents in order to make the transition easier for them and to keep them on track during the school year.


Posted on in Family Law

blended familiesOver the years, many stereotypes have arisen about stepfamilies. From tales involving evil stepmothers to television shows depicting the perfect mix of complementary stepsiblings, it seems the public portrayal of blended families may have experienced a shift in our culture. A recent article suggests that the idea of the perfect blended family is unrealistic and that stepfamilies should be viewed in a more realistic, and less traditional, sense.

Outdated Terms

The author of the article suggests terms such as “broken family,” “co-wives,” and “blended family” are not only outdated, but in many ways, offensive. These terms promote inaccurate views of divorce, suggest strange versions of relationships, and imply ignorance about the reality of stepfamily life. All of these presuppositions, the author says, contribute to unrealistic expectation of family life and result in divorce in many cases.

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